Sunday, March 05, 2006
(quick send in the clowns) don't bother they're here

standing on the outside, looking in at you. standing on the inside, knowing how others are standing on the outside, and what they see looking in. and i don't know how to show you what i can see, how to put it across to you, somehow let you understand what they see and how they're judging you, and how you could still turn things around. i want to protect you from their condescending assumptions and judgements, but i can't do it without being harsh and seeming to be unsupportive, unsympathetic. standing next to you, watching others watching you. i want to tell them why you do the things you do, why you say the things you say, but i'm not sure how to. so i just pretend i don't see anything, don't feel the vibes radiating outwards and the condemnation in their eyes.. pretend to be oblivious. sometimes i wonder if i make others this frustrated with my stubborn determination not to sell myself out.

funny how you see so much, and yet see nothing at all. i never understood before where the cliche about starry eyes came from. but if you've ever seen deep, dark eyes shining in the light of the morning sun, you'll understand why they bring to mind silver shots of stars that flash, luminous, like a secret in the night sky. of course, to de-romanticize everything, the person is probably thinking of what to eat next, while you're drowning in the said person's dark eyes. this brings to mind another cliche - the tall, dark and handsome stranger. there is something about dark brows and dark eyes, really. they are so drownable-in. i really do like cliches. they make so much sense, and put things so nicely, hence becoming cliches due to enthusiastic overuse by culprits like yours truly.
3:47 PM ; 13 comments