finished my cca testimonial an hour ago. it took me three hours to write. mainly because i'm not used to writing about myself in third person, much less trumpeting my own horn in third person. had trouble cramming it all into one page because i am not by nature a concise person. i hope i don't look back five years from now be all 'geez! i was such a busy person', because i can't be any less busy than this and still qualify as something more than mould.

my sister picked up my lit text (that was lying about on my table, in the way of my stash of biscuits) and went, 'what's this?? four revenge tragedies??' but then she likes agatha christie. and didn't quite like the god of small things.

gp and pc tomorrow. what's there to say? what will be, will be. step by step, heart to heart, left right left, we all fall down, like toy soldiers.. bit by bit, torn apart, we never win, and the battle wages on for the toy soldiers.

i always thought 'bit by bit' could also be 'beat by beat'. har. har. i'd love to learn the drums only i have no sense of rhythm (or rhyme). my chinese name belies my natural inability. and because i'm bored (which i should NOT be),

the Romantic
Thanks for taking the test !
you chose BY - your Enneagram type is FOUR.

"I am unique"

Romantics have sensitive feelings and are warm and perceptive.

How to Get Along with Me

- Give me plenty of compliments. They mean a lot to me.
- Be a supportive friend or partner. Help me to learn to love and value myself.
- Respect me for my special gifts of intuition and vision.
- Though I don't always want to be cheered up when I'm feeling melancholy, I sometimes like to have someone lighten me up a little.
- Don't tell me I'm too sensitive or that I'm overreacting!

What I Like About Being a Four

- my ability to find meaning in life and to experience feeling at a deep level
- my ability to establish warm connections with people
- admiring what is noble, truthful, and beautiful in life
- my creativity, intuition, and sense of humor
- being unique and being seen as unique by others
-having aesthetic sensibilities
-being able to easily pick up the feelings of people around me

What's Hard About Being a Four

- experiencing dark moods of emptiness and despair
- feelings of self-hatred and shame; believing I don't deserve to be loved
- feeling guilty when I disappoint people
- feeling hurt or attacked when someone misundertands me
- expecting too much from myself and life
- fearing being abandoned
- obsessing over resentments
- longing for what I don't have

Fours as Children Often

- have active imaginations: play creatively alone or organize playmates in original games
- are very sensitive
- feel that they don't fit in
- believe they are missing something that other people have
- attach themselves to idealized teachers, heroes, artists, etc.
- become antiauthoritarian or rebellious when criticized or not understood
- feel lonely or abandoned (perhaps as a result of a death or their parents' divorce)

Fours as Parents

- help their children become who they really are
- support their children's creativity and originality
- are good at helping their children get in touch with their feelings
- are sometimes overly critical or overly protective
- are usually very good with children if not too self-absorbed

Renee Baron & Elizabeth Wagele

The Enneagram Made Easy
Discover the 9 Types of People
Harper SanFrancisco, 1994, 161 pages

the result of this? i'm digging a hole to crawl into right now.